Survival

Once again we find ourselves in survival mode. We have been down to the wire before, but never like the present. I like to call this week, do or die week. So much lies within the next two days, I don't even know where to begin. I have my bad days where I feel like I can't breathe and worry takes over. Then I have to remind myself, that I am not in charge, nor do I have any control. It's hard, but I have to pound that into my brain. God has always taken care of us, why would He all of a sudden stop now. Why bring us to this very spot, through all that we have been through, for this adventure/opportunity to fail? So many things have happened with all involved, it just doesn't make sense. We are not the only ones in this crunch, just to let you know. The opportunity that we have been given is incredible. When talking about the future of this endeavor, I am left with a feeling of laughter toward our current situation. But then I pull myself back almost to the gasping stage and put myself in the here and now. I guess what I'm trying to say is, I don't want to count the chickens before they hatch. The future with this opportunity will change lives forever. Right now though, I'm just praying for ends to meet and to have a little extra to start paying down the baggage. All prayers are welcomed and much appreciated. Even if you have no idea what you're praying for, God does and that's all that matters.

Visiting Childhood Again

Growing up I was always into race cars, jets, cars in general, and what not. I was only 14 months older than my brother and I guess my dad's influence kept me from the girly stuff. Not that I'm complaining. When I found out that the Blue Angels were going to perform in Twin Falls, I had to go. It had been years since I've seen them, in fact I think it was the Thunderbirds that I saw last. I don't even know when that was. Anyways, I can remember dreaming of being a fighter pilot. And this last weekend most definitely reminded me of that. Don't know why I never went into the Air Force, life, I guess. Maybe it was just a fantasy of mine, but nevertheless, I still love fighter planes. I took the kids down with me to experience it themselves. My son took to it instantly, in fact he wanted to ride every single plane he saw. Try explaining to a 3 year old why he can't take a ride in an F16 or F18! My daughter on the other hand could take it or leave it, meaning, she could really care if she was there or not. Guess she doesn't share the same enthusiasm of jets with me, that's okay! We were there from 10am to about 430pm. It was hot, but it was well worth it. Especially when the F16 took flight. We ran out of the airport air conditioning to see it, then my son started freaking out screaming. He's seen them at a distance, but never this close to where you could physically feel the afterburners shaking you. Guess it was too much for him. He wanted it to land so it would be over. I don't even know how much of the Blue Angels they saw, between them crying (due to being tired and hot-they flew last, of course) and begging to go home. I myself didn't get to fully take in the experience because I was trying to get them to stop crying and then my son fell on his elbows from leaning on the orange plastic fence and was bleeding. When one of the Blue Angels snuck up behind the crowd then hit the afterburners once he was above us and flew over center point, it startled everyone and I missed out on the whole thing. Well, really only the taking in the experience part of it. You can't not miss that. At least I had a bag of skittles in my bag. That stopped the crying long enough to watch them fly, amazing what they do in those things. I loved every minute of it, and I think the kids did too. They have been reenacting the air show since we left Sunday and asking when we can see them again. I am so happy they enjoyed it because as a child I loved it also, and still do to this day. BTW, that is my picture taken from my piddly outdated digital camera. Not bad, huh? My timing was pretty good too. You should see some of them, I got either the nose or the tail. Quite funny.

Oh Yeah!

I have found a new addiction! This past Saturday my husband and I were invited to the Y downtown to join in a class called Body Jam (choreographed dance) by some friends who teach it. Oh yeah! I can't stop thinking about it. What a rush and an incredible workout! I can't wait to go back and do it again. After body jam which is an hour, I was asked to stick around and do Body pump, also an hour (choreographed weightlifting to music for each muscle group-the whole body!). Of course I stayed. It is now Monday and I'm still aching. Typically my workouts have consisted of Tae Bo at home. It does get boring after awhile, hence why I had a block for about 3 months and wanted nothing to do with it. Now I have a new excitement for working out. I can't believe how much of a cardio workout Body Jam is. I have never sweated so bad, not even in an hour workout of Tae Bo, well maybe. But definitely not in the 30 minutes I'm used to doing at home. Now if only I can figure out a way to fit a Y membership into our poor non-existing budget so that our family has a wide array of stuff to do, oh and free swim lessons!

On another note, yesterday was a family reunion with my mom's side of the family. I was able to see cousins I haven't seen in who knows how many years. It was a lot of fun, very hot, too hot in fact. I wish we had all done a better job staying in contact with each other over the years. Anyways, it was great to see them and I hope that we see more of each other over the years. I have a great family on my mom's side and they're all a lot of fun to be around. Sad at how you forget that when so much time passes between visits. Hopefully the coming years we will all be closer.

Hmmph, what to say, what to say

Not much going on here. Typical lazy summer. Kids stay up way too late, sleep in late (that's a good thing), so do I (that's bad). Dog has found new ways to ruin the back yard, can't trust her inside alone and can't trust outside alone. I think she needs a friend. Not yet though, she's going to have to wait for somethings to fall into place. Lets see, have a mini family reunion this weekend. I get to see cousins I haven't seen anywhere from 5 years ago to 10+ years ago. Should be interesting. I finally decided to start working out again (it's been over 3 months). Finally got tired of the downward slope I was seeing in myself and after seeing the lbs melt off of my husband, well, that too was a huge motivator. It's only been the 4Th work out day so I still have to mentally prepare myself and give myself a little pep talk. That wall I hit over 3 months ago w/ my work outs was quite a dandy one! Kids are fine, being kids I guess. Most days they get along. My son I think finally got tired of being beat up on, so now we typically are on him for hitting sissy. My husband has also seen him sit on her to where she couldn't get up. He is 3 years younger and outweighs her. I actually am buying XS sizes in the boys section now. Unbelievable. He's a brute and she's controlling. Nice mix. I had a little talk with her today about not controlling other people and telling them how to play and what to say and telling others they're doing something wrong. I tried to get across the point to let people be who they "are" and to try encouraging them rather than running their lives. She's 6 and I'm having to have these talks. What else is going on in my life? The movie I've been waiting on for 3 years is finally releasing this Friday, that's right, The Dark Knight!!! Can't wait to see it in the movie theatre. Well, hope your days are more eventful than mine! One more thing before I leave. Why the heck is it so difficult to find a good butter dish!!!! I have been searching for a good one for months and have had no luck. I just don't get it. Well, have a good one.

Aaaahhh, Parenthood

Yesterday I came upon a new fear of parenthood, something that was there all the time but never faced, until yesterday of course. We had hung out yesterday afternoon with some new friends in the making in our neighborhood, being exposed to a new culture and new food. They are great people and I can't wait to get to know them better. Anyway, they had also invited us over for the evening. My husband said he was going to take his bike over there (back side of the park in our neighborhood) to see if we were still on for the evening. I was upstairs when he left. I heard the door to the garage open and I came downstairs only to find my daughter. I asked where her brother was and she said he took his bike to find daddy. I looked down the street where my husband went and then toward the street that leads out of the neighborhood to lake hazel. No sign of my boy. My instincts told me to take my bike and head towards the street out of the neighborhood. Mother instincts were correct. There was my boy heading toward Lake Hazel. There is one more street in our neighborhood that crosses the street he was on before leaving the neighborhood. He was in the middle of that little intersection and a car was coming. Thankfully they weren't speeding like some people in this neighborhood, but they had to stop because my son was in the way. Oh I was so mad at him and scared! I marched his little behind home. My husband was just getting home and I had to share what happened. Now here is the funny part, the only funny part. When we got inside, I quickly noticed he had ridden his bike w/o any pants or underwear on! Classic! All he had on was his helmet (at least he put that on) and a t-shirt. Needless to say, we had a long talk w/ him why he is not to ride w/o mommy and daddy and not near any major streets. He has also been grounded from his bike for awhile. At 3 he just doesn't understand that he isn't invincible and that riding a bike has a lot of responsibility w/ it. Oh we have entered a new stage of parenthood and my stress level has just increased all the more. I often wonder how my parents did it because as a kid, danger just doesn't enter your mind.

FAMILY

Today, I just have to give great praise to the family I have in my life. My in-laws who have always been there, thank you. And today, my brother and sister-in-law. Today, I give you two all my love and all my thanks for being my family and really coming through as a family should when it counts. Tomorrow is my 30th birthday. To be quite honest I haven't really been looking forward to this birthday at all. I don't know why this one is so different and why I am struggling with this one. Maybe it is because at 30 I am wondering what exactly have I accomplished in my life. Thanks to my mother-in-law, I was reminded of how far my marriage has come in the last 8 years and the last 6 years I have been blessed with 2 children. Those are great accomplishments. Both my husband and I feel like this is the turning point in our lives. We have made some costly mistakes and what not in the past, and now we feel we have been placed where we are for a reason in a situation with ample opportunity to forever change our lives. That I give all my thanks to God, and for my family of course. Now that I have strayed some-what from my original reason to post this blog, I will get back to that. As I have stated, my brother and sis-in-law really came through for me today. At the beginning of the week they told me they couldn't come the BBQ being held today for my husband and I to celebrate our 30th. Work schedules couldn't be changed. So they would come tomorrow. I was a little bummed, but I know they stick to their word and they would be here for my actual b-day. Well, this morning, I received a call from my mother saying that something last minute with my dad's job came up and they too would not be there. This news I took much harder and more personal. If any of you know my background and the struggles I have had in this area, you would know why this one upset me the most. Although growing up I was always taught that family always comes first, I also came to understand that there was a disclaimer attached (unspoken of course, but never-the-less, it was always there); work came first also. So this morning, in my eyes, once again, work got in the way without any regard to my feelings. I was told they would be here tomorrow, but I soon found out that I wouldn't be home all day because of some plans made for me weeks in advance (of course I don't know the details).

Now to my praise. My sis-in-law got the news right after I called my brother and told him. She got pretty upset (keep in mind she lives around my folks and sees a lot) and said that she wasn't going to let me have this BBQ w/o my side of the family there. So she called in sick for today and they are packing everything up and will be here for the BBQ and my day tomorrow! Right now there are not enough words for me to express my gratitude to them and how much this means to me. I'm tearing up even thinking about it now. And thanks for their quickness of pulling through when it matters, my mom will also be here (she's riding with them). I am sad that my dad won't be here today. I do know that what came up with the job was out of his hands, but if it were me and my children, believe me, I'd move the world. Don't get me wrong, I love my folks, they did an awesome job and I thank them. Everyone has their quirks though and now that I'm getting older, I'm finding what "I" believe in and what really matters to me. Family, and the little intricacies that come with them, no matter what, I will always do my darnedest to be there when it counts.

Like Father Like Son

This last weekend I went to Twin Falls and then on to ID Falls to celebrate my grandmother's 89th Birthday with my family. Driving, even though your sitting, for some reason always zaps your energy. When a few of us girls got back from the store, we walked in the door to my aunts house and found my brother and his son like this, zonked! Little did they know we were snapping pictures of them. My lil' nephew absolutely loves his daddy! Anyone would know it if you were together with them. I can't believe that he'll be 1 in a little over a week. It seems just like yesterday I was in the hospital room w/ my brother and sis-law watching the birth of my lil' nephew. I thank her from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to be there and share in that moment. It is quite different being the observer than the one birthing. It in itself is a whole new experience and now I have that, since when I'm the one birthing, you don't get to see what's happening. While I was gone, my husband had our two kids. He is so good with them and keeping them active and taking them places. He took them hiking Saturday and they absolutely loved it. My son is a mini version of my husband. He loves the rock climbing, climbing what ever he can really, and just being outdoors. My son may have freckles from me, body build of my brother, humor like my brother, but he most definitely is his father's son.

Oh where oh where have you gone...

I think in some previous post, months ago, I stated I was probably suffering from the winter blues or severe summer fever. Call it what you want. So here we are middle of June, my 3oth birthday just 10 days away (yikes), the 1st day of summer, and where in the world is summer? What is with this. I think that this year, I am a firm believer in weather affecting our moods. I know other things contribute, but man oh man, it has been quite depressing around here. I actually ran my heat today. My heat! Clouds, rain, cold weather, oh and don't forget 7 inches of snow off of I-84 in Oregon and snow advisory for McCall!!!!! Need I say more?! There is only one plus to all of this, my lack in working out and summer not here, at least I don't have to get into a swim suit or shorts for that matter. I have more time, or at least a little more time.

The Waiting Game

Well, my "evil one" finally got spayed on Sunday. The past two days have been great with her, she's actually been calm and has left the kids alone. Today she seems like she has fully recovered from the effects of anesthesia. So now it's a waiting game to see if spaying will actually help calm her a bit down the road. It was funny, when I went to pick her up and they give you all the instructions before taking her home, one of their instructions was like giving a bad kid constructive criticism. I felt like she got into trouble. My little Barley in trouble, no way! :) They told me that they "HIGHLY" recommend obedience training for her. The quotes and capitalization is to emphasise how it came across to me. I couldn't help but laugh inside. My poor 3rd child was too rowdy and now I'm getting instructions on how to remedy it. I know she needs obedience training, she's so smart, it will only make her that much better of a dog at home and around others. She may have her moments, but she really is a great dog! I know this is mean, but I wish I would have video taped her the day I brought her home. She kept swaying, her eyes couldn't focus for very long, and to add even more humor, I had them put a cone on her so she wouldn't lick the sutures. She kept running into things and even tripping over it in a sense. It's not as funny now, now she whips her head side to side with a lot of force until it flies off of her head. Gotta love dogs.

Back Breaking Work

Our yard is almost complete. Thanks to a lot of help from family and friends, our fence was completed in 1 day last weekend. Since then, my husband and I have been quite busy w/ our yard (front/back). The front is done (shrubs, rock, fixing grass thanks to the "Evil One" aka Barley) and now we have some rock hauling and french drains to do in the back, and we'll be done! I don't know if any of you have tried shoveling and hauling rock, let me just say it's tough work. It would be nice to just pay someone to do it, but from my experience (I did the front myself!), when the job is complete, there is a bit of pride in it. Anyway, that has been my week. It will be so nice to finally be done and then relax and enjoy the privacy of our new back yard. My next venture, painting! It never ends :) After asking if it was okay to purchase some paint here some time, my husband was quite nice in telling me that he absolutely will NOT be picking up a paint brush. That's okay, the projects are small anyways. Well, my back flower beds are calling my name, they're covered with weed barrier and waiting for rock! One quick side note of good news. I believe that something finally clicked in my son and he is finally fully potty trained! This will be his 3rd day of being dry. He has been doing it all himself, no help from mommy. Today is his first official day in underwear. I am so proud of him! He gets a little hot wheel everyday that he stays dry and once it's consistent (which I believe he pretty much is), he gets to go and pick out a big hot wheel set!

EVILNESS!!!!

Yes, that is my new nickname for our chocolate lab! She's on my black list right now and hasn't quite worked herself off of it. Let me preface this with how things have gone since Friday. My son hasn't quite gotten over some weird cough, the kind that if you get a coughing spell you throw up. Well, Friday after dinner we gave the kids some ice cream in "pink" ice cream cones. They started running around the house w/ daddy and yes, my son threw up all over the carpet in my front room. "PINK" ice cream cone, mind you, stains quickly. So I whipped out the steam cleaner and saved the carpet. Well, Saturday morning rolls around and my daughter is heading out w/ my husband to a teen focus car wash and can't find her sun hat. So I head up stairs to find it and hear something that just doesn't sound right. I came running downstairs and wished I wasn't seeing what I saw. I came closer and my fears were confirmed, Barley had decided to chew 2 holes in my carpet!!!! This house isn't even a year old. She even decided to eat the carpet fibers. It took me a while to realize that she was getting the carpet in the exact same spot that my son got sick on. She is lucky to be alive right now! Thankfully we have plenty of carpet left over from construction, but I haven't found any carpet adhesive yet and haven't mustered up the energy to fix it. PURE EVILNESS! She's seems to be on a streak for some reason. Well, my weekend didn't stop there, but I won't go on a complaining spree. So I'll leave it at that. Let me end with this, Barley, you are lucky you are so cute and have been for the most part a good dog!

Liar Liar Pants on Fire!

I was trying to think of something to write on all day and thanks to my lovely daughter, she provided it for me! So my 2 kids got these huge lolly pops at a birthday party. This is only the second time I've allowed them to take some licks off of them. My daughter chose the blueberry one, as you can clearly see in the picture. I need to add a quick fact here, it has been quite some time that I have stopped my kids from sucking their fingers. Took 1 day! It has just been this last week or so that I have on rare occasions caught my daughter sucking hers again. I am very quick to threaten adding that nasty polish on her fingers again, to which she quickly pulls them from her mouth. Well, back to today. After playing upstairs for a bit, my daughter came down stairs to sit next to me on the couch. She started to ask for some cereal when I quickly noticed "BLUE" fingers. I also noticed that they were the 2 fingers she would suck on. I asked her point blank if she had been sucking on them and of course it was a no. I started laughing and held up her hand. There was no denying it anymore. She gave a me little smirk and then I pulled the camera out, now I have proof! Thanks sweetie for such a great picture!

Much Ado About Nothing

I don't have time to really write anything, but thought I'd drop a quick note on my weekend. There seems to be so much going on that my mind is forgetting simple things. Crazy. Friday we had some new friends over for a BBQ. Really cute couple and a lot of fun. They are recently married and moved here from Lynchburg, VA. Hey what do you know. Anyway, their happy to meet a couple that has something in common and "knows" the Boise area. It will be fun getting to know them. Saturday was a blur. From stopping by a Teen Focus car wash that my husband helped at, to a trip to Barnes and Noble (we messed up the times for the school book fair for my daughter, so to make it up we went to BN and bought her a book, dragons, who would have guessed). Then we had to get home because sod was being laid out back. Sunday, Mothers Day. I'll leave it at that. So here we are again, starting the crazy cycle for the week. Monday. Is it Friday yet? There are some things on the up and up. Yeah! For now I must go back to life as a stay at home mom and clean a few bathrooms, cook some cookies and lemon ricotta muffins and clean a downstairs so that we can host home teams tonight. Adios.

Just call me Mrs. Handywoman!

I don't doubt myself very often when it comes to my abilities, although deep down there does lie a little doubt. There are some things I just don't attempt for fear of messing up, could be costly depending on the job. Although, yesterday I was quite pleased with myself. In fact, I even had to call my folks up and brag about it. I have been putting off a lot of things that needed to be done with my house not for fear of doing it, more than likely because of laziness. I don't know what got into me yesterday, but I am still amazed at myself. Without any help, I assembled and installed 2 ceiling fans! Some may say, that isn't a feat, but have you ever tried to install a ceiling fan? They are a pain in the you know what! I can see why some just pay to have someone else do it. My first attempt at such a job and successful. The kids are still excited over their new fans. Don't tell my husband, but the tools in the garage are truly mine. :) Well, I'm off to start on my next ceiling fan and bathroom fixture.

FREEDOM!

In all my married years, almost 8 to be exact, I have never had a backyard. Yes, I have lived in 2 previous homes that had yards, but let me clarify. Virginia doesn't know how to grow GRASS!! A very missed "luxury" while living there. Our yards were pretty much made up of crabgrass, weeds, rock, and clay. My poor kids! Anyway, with some unexpected funds helping, we are finally putting in our back yard in our new home. Today, they are clearing the field of weeds, leveling with top soil, and who knows what else. I can't wait! Soon there will be sprinklers, grass, a fence, and yes, FREEDOM and SANITY. My children are thrilled and even our dog peers out back with yearning eyes. Maybe when it's finished I'll post a picture of our first true backyard. I can see much BBQing, playing, planting, and a fire pit in our near future.

Color!

Okay, it has been decided that we will not be switching homes anytime soon. Thank the Lord for that on many many levels. My track record of moving is quite impressive, and I'm just thinking of my married years. You should hear about all the moves growing up. Anyway, we are currently undergoing a refinance which is huge for us. Opens up some breathing room. Since there is no move in the near future of a year or so, I am desperately wanting to make my home my own. I need COLOR! Right now it's the cheapest decorating tool and does so much for a room. But, I have a problem. My last endeavour of painting my old house in VA left a bad taste in my mouth. It was the whole idea of finishing a basement, won't go into too much detail. I'll just say it was a time I'd rather not look back on, too stressful. Anyway, now I cringe at the sight of a paint brush and roller. I'm really good at it, that's not the problem. I seem to have a block now, no motivation. Maybe I just need to buck up and do it. Start off small and maybe it won't be a problem. Who knows. Now that we're starting on our yard, yeah!!!!, I would like to add a little something to the inside. Maybe a visit to the good 'ole Home Depot and some color swatches might jump start a decorating job.

"I'm Superman, Mommy!"

Gone are the days of my "baby!" He is a true little boy now and finding his own interests, no longer his sisters. Not leaving behind Hot Wheels by any means, his new adventure, SUPERMAN. He could watch a superman dvd over and over and not get bored with it. But he's graduated from just watching it to "becoming" superman. My couch cushions go flying and he rips off his shirt and starts to fly and flex his little muscles! Apart from getting annoyed by constantly putting my couch back together 5+ times a day, I can't help but laugh. When he's in the moment and I ask him to do something, he always replies with, "I'm not P*****, I'm Superman!" I miss my little baby, but I'm enjoying seeing him grow up and become the boy that he is. Now that he's starting to separate himself from his sister's interests, I am so amazed at how different the two of them are and how their little minds work. They each have "their own" way about them. It keeps my life interesting!

Stained buns?!

Okay, so I haven't blogged in awhile. Not really anything interesting going on lately, but today, stained buns. Yesterday my mother-in-law took my kiddos and I out to lunch and then onto TCBY. It's spring break and she wanted to spend some time with the kids. Anyway, my son decided to pick the most interesting and the brightest colored yogurt there was. Just looking at it disgusted me, but he liked it. Of course, this is the one day I don't have my camera in my purse. His mouth was every shade of the yogurt. He looked like a clown. It was quite cute, especially when I looked in the back seat to see him sleeping (while we waited for my mom to finish w/ a dr's appt). Here he is, sound asleep, stained mouth, and holding a green balloon that he got from Red Robbin. Classic! Anyways, just moments ago he came to me wanting his pants changed because he pooped in them, failing to go to the potty like we've been practicing. I couldn't believe my eyes when I pulled the diaper back to check to see if he was telling me the truth. Greenish/blue!!! Not only was that weird, but his little buns are stained blue. It took me awhile to run through my head what he'd eaten and then it donned on me, TCBY!! It may have taken a full 24hrs to process, but it showed up in all it's glory! They should ban that yogurt. To stain my child's buns, I don't even want to know what kind of dye was used to achieve such a feat!

Still no time

I can't believe it has been over a month! For me, there truly is not enough time in a day. Life is a lot busier here for me than in VA. My schedule is usually pretty much booked as much as I want it to be booked. Constantly trying to keep up w/ bills, cleaning, laundry, and such. The holidays are making that even harder right now, as usual. Oh and yeah, our newest addition to the family! She's cute, brown, furry, and has 4 legs. Yes, that would be a little 9week chocolate lab, Barley!! It is like having a 3rd kid, yes probably easier than really having a 3rd, but still. I can't get anything done. Potty training! Yeah. I should be potty training my son, but can't put full attention on that, I don't fully trust lil' Barley just yet. I'm not completely ignoring my son's potty training, we are trying, just not pure, uninterrupted attention. Oh yeah, after his bath last night I asked him if he needed to go and he got his stuff on the toilet and went pee! Awesome!! He was pretty excited and so were we. Can't wait to drop that expense. Anyway, got stuff to do while Barley is in her kennel for trying to eat a christmas ball ornament, that could have ended badly. A picture of her will follow here sometime, hopefully sooner than later.

I'm baaaaack!

Quick run down since last post. Moved to ID summer '07, lived w/ in-laws for 4 months, and now, we finally have moved into our new home. Life has been crazy, feels like we went from 0mph to 100mph since moving to ID. I couldn't be happier though. This post is short and sweet, I promise I will start to make this a daily ritual again, but for right now I have some more "organizing" to do in my new home. It seems like it never ends!